Chasing Shadows on the Wall

by maslider@aol.com



Once again our dauntless duo investigates unexplained phenomena, squabble and save the day for Georgetown Institute's Paranormal Research Unit.

Below is a create your own day of adventure for another mission into supernatural inquiry. So, please, create your own Shadow Chaser's episode by selecting from the following classic plot elements:

Episode opens with:
a) A fleeing medieval maiden screaming as she gazes back to see a huge axe swinging towards her neck.
b) A young boy dressed as a jester stares in horror at a headless specter lurching towards him with arms outstretched.
c) A knight in plate armor shouts a warning and runs along a battlement towards a falling woman in medieval robes.
d) All of the above

After the thrilling opening credits, Dr. Jonathan MacKensie trips over his own feet as he tries to sneak across a university hallway before his boss, Dr. Juliana Moorhouse can catch him. She appears in his classroom doorway triumphantly waving his new assignment right after he relaxes and begins his class lecture.

a) "You need to debunk the haunted castle theories of a bombastic, self-aggrandizing publicity hound who has terrorized an entire city." Jonathan replies, "I'll be happy to bring scientific impartiality to the study of the phenomena. Should I pick up Benny on the way?" He's horrified by her response: "It is Edgar Benedek."
b) Dr. Moorhouse tells him he can't finish teaching 'The Anthropology of the Brain' or present his newest paper on 'the possibility of a bicameral brain existing in Ramapithecus and quasi-contemporary hominids' until he investigates a haunted reconstruction of a medieval castle.
c) She warns him that his annual evaluation is next week and he hasn't produced any reports lately as Director of the Paranormal Research Unit.
d) All of the above

Jonathan is surprised to find Edgar 'Benny' Benedek at the scene of the mysterious incident dressed in a pseudo-medieval disguise of astonishingly bad taste in neon colors with high topped athletic shoes. They go off to have dinner together, discussing the haunted castle mystery at a restaurant where Benny eats:

a) Anchovy pizza topped with yogurt and hosein sauce.
b) Raw meat and sugar flambe on a baked potato.
c) Fig Newtons soaked in vinegar and raw eggs.
d) All of the above

Benedek swiftly contacts a talented psychic friend from:

a) Outer Mongolia, Benny charters a special jet using Jonathan's credit card.
b) The Maldive Islands, Benny sends a newly bought pontoon plane to pick them up.
c) A hobo who jumped a train from Wyoming where he works as a Carnival geek.
d) None of the above. The guest psychic, Dugan Foch, is actually Benny channeling an ancient druid.

Dugan Foch shows up dressed in a rainbow colored curtains wrapped around street clothes and promptly resolves the mystery through his mysterious ability to:

a) Taste the past by licking the pavement and sniffing assorted clues.
b) Sense ghosts by hopping up and down like a chicken while quacking like a duck.
c) Asking his pet psychic piglet "Sweetiekins" to tap out the answer in Morse code using her little cloven hooves.
d) All of the above

Jonathan fast becomes hysterical when he realizes that Benny's shenanigans are bound to cost a pretty penny. So he goes off to research the situation at the local library leaving Benny to get abducted by the frightening creature seen at the beginning of the episode. Hung upside down by a thin, rapidly disintegrating rope over the edge of the reconstructed castle battlements in the middle of the County Fair, Benny's only hope is for rescue is Jonathan!

Benny is about to plunge to his death on the black asphalt far below if the villain's candle flame finishes burning through the thin rope tied to his feet before someone somehow makes it past the moat monster and put the candle out in the next few moments.

a) Jonathan is forced to swim a Jell-O filled moat fighting off monsters, climb the castle wall and fight the villains off long enough to put the candle out using an antique enchanted broadsword while wearing a purple and green dinosaur outfit.
b) Jonathan is forced to dress up like a French chambermaid and rescues Benny using only a enamel teakettle and a porcelain soup ladle.
c) Jonathan puts on a fake tree outfit, shuffles up to the drawbridge and lures the villains away by faking a forest fire.
d) Jonathan puts on a Carmen Miranda outfit and lures the villains away long enough to rescue Benny by leaving a trail of slightly bruised fruit and singing "I'm a little Teapot, here's my spout".
e) All of the above in rapid succession

The two shadow chasers return safely to Georgetown Institute in Washington, DC where they:

a) Try to explain to Dr. Moorhouse and the mysterious smoking man who lurks around her office that there was no mysterious occurrence, just a little garden-variety crime.
b) Jonathan tries to explain how Benny spent half a million dollars of Georgetown money in less than three days of investigation.
c) Edgar Benedek explains exactly how supernatural their weekend was, while Jonathan explains how ordinary it was.
d) All of the above

 

-the end-


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